The five worst people on Facebook

The 5 (new) Worst People on Facebook

Who Are the Buzzkills on Facebook?

There have been plenty of posts about the “worst” people on Facebook.. the over-sharer, the vague-booker, the stalker… we’ve all seen them – we all know them. Some of us are them. But I have a few new ones to add to the mix and some of these offenders will make you wish for the baby overdose posters. The five worst people on Facebook

The Gaper

No joke.. there people put the “gaper” in a Gaper’s Delay. They’re the ones who post pictures of accidents and other horrible things that happen. If we come upon an accident or other traumatic events, I tell my kids to not stare out of respect and you’re not only staring but taking a picture and posting it with some lame-ass message asking for prayers. WHAT is that about?

Speaking of prayers.. the next one that rubs me wrong is…

The Over-Prayer

These are the people who want us to pray for every. fricking. thing. “Please pray that Walgreens has cough syrup so that Susie AND I can sleep thru the night.” Look, I don’t pray that often and when I do I guarantee it won’t be for some stupid reason like whether Walgreens shelves are stocked with drugs. You’re not just wasting my time, you’re wasting God’s time. Stop it.

Kumbaya Mah Lord.. 

This person relates to and shares EVERY inspirational quote known to man. And all at the same time so your feed is nothing but an endless stream of images and quotes. I love a good inspirational post myself, but how pathetic is your life that every single one moves you enough to post it? Try some Godfather or Tarantino quotes every now and again would you??

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But First, Let Me Take a Selfie

The people who only post selfies. There are some that I swear I wonder if they’re in a 30 day contest to see who can post the most. There’s one of you in the car and then look! there’s one of you at the Gap! Oh but wait! There’s one of you on vacation with your toes in the water and your ass in the sand. (okay.. I’ve done that one… )

The Sales Pitcher

If you’re selling stuff on Facebook – stop. Well, you don’t have to stop entirely but if you’re posting your wares more than once a week, it’s too much.  We get it. You’re selling the greatest stuff since Tupperware, but I promise you no one wants anymore cooking tools, bags, makeup or shrink-wrap for our thighs. We know what you sell and I promise, we will come find you when we need it.

 

Yikes.. come to think of it, I’ve seen these people too much. Might be time to lighten my load.. I know there are more offensive “sharers” out there but those are my top 5.

Which ones rub you the wrong way?

 

Comments

April 25, 2014 at 2:52 pm

All of the selfies make me want to punch someone in the face.



April 25, 2014 at 7:51 am

F U N N Y.

What about the Whiners, Complainers…. which I fit into sometimes, but these people write about their ailments, colds, and shit like that. All the time. Drives me nuts. I mean, take a freaking Advil, man.
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April 23, 2014 at 11:34 pm

These are awesome, although I love inspirational quotes! Not every day of course but once in a while, I love them! Here’s mine to add…those that are completely cryptic about something that happened, but want sympathy or prayers, or whatever; and the ones that air their dirty laundry on FB all the time.
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April 22, 2014 at 10:04 pm

All of these rub me the wrong way! I absolutely cannot stand the gaper. Lately I’ve seen a lot of “unspoken prayer request please.” I don’t mind praying, but vague posts like that just stir up speculation.
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April 22, 2014 at 7:54 pm

Wow – I was glad I made the cut. I was afraid I was going to be on the most hated list. I would add one more – pictures of food and naked babies. I don’t care what people eat for dinner and if people knew all the pedophiles who can right click and salivate over those cute naked kids, well, they’d dress them up in parkas before posting. Thanks for the laugh, Kristen. It was a good relaxer after a long day.
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    April 22, 2014 at 8:22 pm

    Of course you did!! And yes to the naked babies or any precarious baby/toddler shots. I’ll post food every now and then but it has to be a knock my socks off work of art to make the cut.



AnnMarie Gubenko
April 22, 2014 at 4:31 pm

Yes to all of these. This made me laugh. I totally agree about the over-prayers and will add the “Please pray. I can’t say why but pray.”



April 22, 2014 at 3:04 pm

Ooh, if you would like I can be all five of these people at once. Could be fun, really. 😉
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April 22, 2014 at 2:58 pm

Fortunately I don’t have any gapers in my feed, but I’ve definitely got some over-prayers and Kumbayah-ers, as well as a couple of Sales Pitchers. It does get old. Then again, I’ve gotten ragged on lately for taking too many quizzes and posting them, so what do I know?
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April 22, 2014 at 11:35 am

Yes to all of these!
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April 22, 2014 at 11:19 am

LOL these are great! I hate the ones that do nothing but posts pictures, silly ones at that, and videos, constantly. They get soooo annoying imo!
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April 22, 2014 at 6:52 am

OMG I have not come across any “gapers!” What the??? But the over-prayers are the best. Good Lord! 🙂
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